What can I do if I leak milk during pregnancy? Is it safe to pump?
Our breasts start making changes for feeding around 16 weeks of pregnancy. Every woman has a different experience, and it sounds like your body is leaking colostrum. Leaking or not leaking doesn't show how much milk we will have later. For example, leaking colostrum while pregnant doesn't mean a woman will have tons of milk, and not leaking doesn't mean you won't have enough. It is all about our individual responses
I know as a doula and birth professional who works with hundreds of families a year, there will always be families who want a doula who has the most experience at a higher price tag, and there will always be families who are happy to work with a less-experienced doula at a lower price tag. There is no right or wrong, there is just what is right for you.
Doulas aren’t like other professions we may sometimes link them to – take nurses, for example. You understand when you have need of a nurse that they all met a standard competency, and they all work to keep that license up. Even if your nurse went to school in Washington, or Florida, or the Netherlands, there are core competencies all nurses are expected to learn. There can be some slight variations, but for the most part, the educational requirements are similar.
I have often thought I need that wonderful old t-shirt, "Frankie say relax!", to wear when I am teaching classes or attending a birth. Could you imagine? I often joke that telling someone to relax is like telling someone to calm down -- it isn't helpful, it irritates people, and it often feels accusatory or as if someone overreacted to something. In labor we must learn when to actively relax, and when to work -- here Connie offers her thoughts on the subject.
If you were to believe the movies –- coping in labor means that you look like “The Buddha of Birth.” You sit in a lotus position, gently breathing, eyes closed. People in the birthing room often think that if the laboring person is doing well, they are completely quiet and deeply relaxed during each contraction.
Full-disclosure: I know Allie very well. I even wrote her bio as she is currently out of town at a competitive archery event. I hope I didn't get carried away -- there are a hundred more things I could say about this incredible lady, and I tried to be succinct. Her birth was an incredible journey of strength and surrender. Her husband worked like he had been a doula all his life! The birth team was around, trying to help whenever we could, but Kyle mainly stood at the helm like this was something he did every day. We joked that he needed an honorary doula certification after that. Also on the birth team were midwife LaMonica Bryant, doula and birth photographer Ellie Kolb, and back-up midwife Rachel Donckels. Special thanks to Ellie for allowing her pictures to be shared here.
I had been a doula for over a year when I found out I was pregnant. I was so excited to be on this journey I had fallen in love with and learned so much about. Growing a baby inside my body was everything I had imagined it would be. I had a fairly easy pregnancy, lots of support from my husband, family, and friends that were also birth workers. I had access to tons of information and enjoyed immersing myself even more deeply into all things birth related. I was watching livestreamed births, listening to podcasts, and reading all the books!
In 2014 I shared an opening activity, What's in Your Head? I use this as a way to help families share their concerns and fears about pregnancy, birth, babies, feeding babies, and becoming parents. It helps folks see they aren't alone in the things that might be keeping them awake at night.
Looking for variation, I recreated this idea with Legos -- little plastic building toys we have amassed numerous buckets of over the years. All of these were pulled from our private collection, although the compromise with my kids was to put them in tiny zippy bags so things wouldn't get lost. The first time I did this activity, I passed the Lego head around and had each person pull out a zippy bag and share what they thought the toys might represent. In my next series, I decided to include a card with a general worry that related to the item in the zippy bag. I had participants look at the item first and see if it reminded them of any concerns they had, and if they were stumped, they could read the card. Then we go around the group and share our items and what they might represent.
I recently stumbled upon a gem of an article which examines pushing positions for the second stage of labor. It was published in 1987 by the American Journal of Public Health. The author, Lauren Dundes, MHS, maintains our traditional Western lithotomy position (person on their back with feet up in stirrups) was never based on any sort of evidence. What it was based on were things like:
As a doula, it is not unusual for me to see laboring folks who start to feel like pushing when they are in an upright position, such as in the shower or on the toilet. The pressure remains between contractions, building; the person wants to push, and they are told to stop and wait for their provider. When the provider arrives the laboring patient is told to get into lithotomy position and resume pushing. Suddenly the urge seems gone! Whereas the person was just being told, "baby's right here, pant and blow, your doctor is just parking the car..." now it seems to have fizzled out.
The person may have lost the pressure to push, but the pressure to not waste the provider's time has just begun.
I recently had the opportunity to be part of a training for a local hospital's BFHI process. I wanted a tactile way for people to feel the differences in palate shapes. Needing the models to be comparable to a newborn's mouth-size, I had the idea of using plastic spoons.
Almost as soon as I got the positive pregnancy test with my third baby, I started having panic attacks. I would wake up, anxious and scared, from a dead sleep. This was a surprise pregnancy that I did not plan. In my mind, the timing wasn't right.
I dealt with these panic attacks as best I could. They came in the day and in the night. When I found myself begging my husband to come home from work and help me cope, I realized I was dealing with more than just a little bit of scared feelings.
In my experience, many pregnant people FEAR THE BIG BABY! I myself fell prey to this when pregnant with my first child. I went to an OB visit that happened to be on my due date. My doctor said to me, "Are you ready to get this over with? Because I think he's getting kind of big." In my mind, there was nothing scarier than THE BIG BABY! I didn't want THE BIG BABY! I had read in "What to Expect When You're Expecting" (or as I refer to it, "What to Expect When You're Paranoid"), that doctors don't induce unless it's medically necessary. At that time I figured if it came from my doctor's mouth, that meant it was medically necessary. And because I was afraid of THE BIG BABY, I agreed.
Sometimes a cesarean is necessary and a family knows this before labor begins. This gives them a chance to prepare in ways they may not have thought of during a regular labor-turned-cesarean birth.
♥ four young boys and a boy dog (offspring)