I don't know about you, but I always love a good doula review written by a dad! Thanks to Russel for sharing his thoughts about his experience with their birth doula. Incidentally, their birth doula was Julisa Lagos, of Lansing, MI.
I was all for a doula, once I realized what doulas do. While pregnant, my wife's idea of a fun night together was sitting at the library, pulling down pregnancy book, after birth book, after breast feeding book, after baby book, and telling me all the things I needed to know. My idea of a fun night together was...not this. Don't get me wrong, when it is time for me to buy a TV or a car or a grill I am all about reading up on all the specs and reviews I can possibly find. When it came to having a baby, I was content to just go along with the flow; I didn't know there was much choice out there or options to decide between. Bottom line: if a doula was an encyclopedia of all-about-babies-and-how-they-get-here, then sign me up...because I need to focus on the best carseat and crib and baby bath.
Our doula came to our house and brought information when we needed it. When my wife had a question and wanted the best information about it, bingo, best sources without having to scour the internet.
When I was out of town for work our doula was on call, ever though it wasn't really close to my wife's duedate. For me, knowing our doula could be with my wife in case labor happened while I was gone, gave me a sense of comfort.
My wife's water broke and we called the office. When we called, the after hours answering service said they would take a message and a doctor would call us back. Panicked about what to do while we waited, we called our doula. She reminded us of the talk we had with our doctor about handling this situation. She reminded us about writing down the time, the color, the smell, and the amount of fluid (yay!), plus how our baby was moving and if labor contractions started yet, and to give all this information to our doctor. She said she was ready and waiting for our next move, and that could be waiting at home, or going to the hospital. It made me feel like a huge weight was just lifted from my shoulders!
Once my wife's labor started our doula was there helping us through the birthing contractions. She reminded me how I could help my wife. Our doula answered questions for me before I could even ask her. She knew our doctor and was very friendly with our nurses. It seemed like everyone was there for us as a team, and I think that shows she had a good relationship with the hospital.
As a nervous dad I suddenly felt like I was getting a pop quiz for a subject I never studied! But our doula made up the difference in a way that showed me I wasn't a slacker, I was just a new dad. I'm not quite ready to do this all over again since we aren't really even sleeping through the night yet. But I do know, next time, it's doula or bust.
Russel and his, Ruby, have two children now. He wrote this as a review for his doula, who they invited back to their second birth.
♥ four young boys and a boy dog (offspring)